Understanding Emotional Triggers at Work

Not every piece of feedback deserves a reaction. But it always deserves a response. Emotional reactivity is one of the most expensive habits in cross-functional teams. You’ve seen it: 1. A stakeholder makes an offhand comment about a design. 2. A PM questions the process. 3. A dev challenges the scope. And suddenly, we’re defending our role instead of solving the problem. But leadership means knowing the difference between reaction and response. Reaction is immediate. Emotional. Often protective. Response is considered. It takes a beat. It puts the goal ahead of the ego. Here’s a simple framework I use with design leads under pressure: 1. Observe – What exactly was said? Not how it made you feel. 2. Pause – Give space before replying. Silence is strategic. 3. Reframe – What’s the intent behind the comment? 4. Respond – With clarity, not friction. You don’t have to be passive. You just have to be intentional. Because if every comment triggers you, you’re not leading the conversation — you’re reacting to it. Where have you seen emotional reactivity slow down alignment or hurt team trust? 🔃If you found this post helpful, repost it with your network. Follow Joe Woodham for weekly insights on design leadership, business fluency, and influence that lasts.

𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐓𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐇𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐏𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐧. 𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞'𝐬 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐃𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐝𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦. Ever have that moment? Someone makes a comment. Your chest tightens. Your face burns red. And before you know it... CHAOS! You've become someone you don't recognize. (SCARY! I know.But it happens even to the best of us!) Two minutes later, you’re replaying it in your head thinking: "Was that really me back there? Was it me back there!" Here's what nobody tells you about triggers: They're not random bursts of emotions. They're your brain's ancient alarm system. When your brain spots something that remotely looks like primal danger, It hits one of three buttons: Fight, Flight or Freeze! ~ Fight (snap back) ~ Flight (shut down) ~ Freeze (blank out) But I will be honest here: You can’t control the alarm. But you can control what happens next. And that’s called reclaiming your POWER. 𝐇𝐨𝐰? 𝐇𝐞𝐫𝐞'𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 4-𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐩 𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐈 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞: ✓ Spot the Trigger: Your body speaks first: racing heart, tight chest, hot face.Notice it before it takes over. ✓ Pause: Yes, literally. Breathe. Count to 5. Take a sip of water. Buy yourself time to switch gears. ✓ Name the Feeling : Say: "I'm feeling X because of Y" Example: "I'm feeling angry because I feel ignored" (When you name it, you own it) ✓ Decide Your Response: Ask yourself, What outcome do I actually want? Then: Pick the response that gets you there. Triggers are inevitable. But letting them control you? That’s a choice. Make a good choice next time! Follow for daily psychological insights. Share this with someone who needs it Reach out if you need any professional help. #psychology #brain #science #success #growth #mindfulness

As I continue exploring what makes high-performing teams tick, I've covered key topics like group dynamics, trust, cohesiveness, and psychological capital. In this post, I want to dive deeper into a crucial aspect of team dynamics: conflict. Conflict is inevitable in any team, even in high-performing ones. However, the difference lies in how these teams handle it. They don't shy away from conflict; instead, they have established rules of engagement and cultural practices for navigating it effectively. They embrace conflict, using it as a tool for growth and innovation—often with the support of a skilled facilitator. Here are some common types of conflict that can arise in the workplace: Conflict in Vision: Example: Disagreement over the company's long-term direction. Impact: Misaligned vision can fragment efforts and lower morale. Resolution: Facilitate discussions to align on a shared vision and involve all stakeholders in the vision-setting process. Conflict in Goals: Example: Differing objectives between departments. Impact: Can create competition rather than collaboration, leading to inefficiencies. Resolution: Establish clear, unified goals and ensure they are communicated across the organization. Conflict in Communication Styles: Example: Misinterpretations due to different communication preferences. Impact: Misunderstandings can escalate into larger conflicts. Resolution: Promote awareness of diverse communication styles and encourage adaptive communication techniques. Conflict in Values: Example: Clashes over ethical decisions or cultural values. Impact: Can lead to deep-seated animosity and ethical dilemmas. Resolution: Create a values-based culture and ensure organizational policies reflect shared values. Conflict in Resource Allocation: Example: Competing demands for limited resources. Impact: Can result in feelings of unfairness and hinder project progress. Resolution: Implement transparent and fair resource allocation processes. Conflict in Roles and Responsibilities: Example: Overlapping or unclear job roles. Impact: Can cause confusion, redundancy, or gaps in task completion. Resolution: Clearly define roles and responsibilities, and regularly review them to avoid overlap. Conflict in Work Styles: Example: Differing approaches to completing tasks or managing time. Impact: Can cause friction and reduce team cohesion. Resolution: Encourage flexibility and understanding of diverse work styles, and find common ground. Conflict in Power Dynamics: Example: Power struggles between employees or teams. Impact: Can lead to a toxic work environment and hinder collaboration. Resolution: Foster a culture of mutual respect and equitable power distribution. What other types of conflict have you encountered in teams? How did you resolve them? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments! #teambuilding #communicationskills #peopleskills

I don't class conflict as a "waste" because not all conflict is bad...but unresolved conflict can be VERY wasteful in organizational improvement efforts. As a Lean and Leadership Coach, I have worked with companies to develop systems and skills to reduce harmful conflict, in order to make continuous improvement a reality. People ask me - how do you know there's conflict in the first place? Do we have to assess it in some way? Short answer yes. The problem has to be visible. My own approach is to ask questions that help me understand it through my 1:1 interviews as part of my Discovery phase. Here's what I (and many studies) see as the 5 of the main causes of workplace conflict...and how to resolve them 👇 👉 Communication Conflict: Studies have found that 39% of workplace conflicts arise from communication differences. I coached 'Joan' who told me that she and her direct report ('Jim') only interact when there's a problem. They both want the same results, but they don't spend time together proactively figuring out how to get them. Resolve it through: ✔️ Holding regular 1:1 and team check-ins ✔️ Reviewing communication and information flow as part of process improvement efforts ✔️ Improving meeting management 👉 Values Conflict: Research indicates that 18% of conflicts are due to clashing values. I see it in teams all the time- 'Mark' valued speed and 'Greg' valued precision. It turned into personal conflict as they were both too set on their own values, to try and understand where the other is coming from. Resolve it through: ✔️ Focusing on shared goals and common ground. ✔️ Respecting different viewpoints ✔️ Investing in people and leader development, to develop these skills in everyone. 👉 Resource Conflict: Studies found that 33% of workplace conflicts are due to too much work without enough support or a clash over differing cross- departmental priorities. A simple example- the Sales team rush orders to hit targets but Operations burns out trying to deliver. Resolve it through: ✔️ Being fair and transparent about resources. ✔️ Prioritizing tasks when resources are limited. ✔️ Working together to find creative solutions. 👉 Personality Conflict: One study found that a whopping 49% of workplace conflicts are attributed to clashes between personalities or egos. This comes down to how people behave, how they judge others and their level of EQ. Resolve it through: ✔️ Learning about different work styles. ✔️ Investing in personal development ✔️ Investing in team EQ development and team bonding 👉 Role Conflict: Unclear roles and responsibilities can cause confusion and disputes. Approximately 22% of workplace conflicts is said to stem from unclear roles. Resolve it through: ✔️ Clearly defining roles and responsibilities. ✔️ Reviewing job duties regularly and using them in 1:1's. ✔️ Discussing and fix any role overlaps. How should we be dealing with conflict in our organizations? Leave your thoughts below 🙏

At Amazon, two of my top engineers had a shouting match that ended in tears. This could be a sign of a toxic workplace or a sign of passion and motivation. Whether it becomes toxic or not all comes down to how management deals with conflict. In order to deal with conflict in your team, it is first essential to understand it. A Harvard study has identified that there are 4 types of conflict that are common in teams: 1. The Boxing Match: Two people within a team disagree 2. The Solo Dissenter: Conflict surrounds one individual 3. Warring Factions: Two subgroups within a team disagree 4. The Blame Game: The whole team is in disagreement My engineers shouting at each other is an example of the boxing match. They were both passionate and dedicated to the project, but their visions were different. This type of passion is a great driver for a healthy team, but if the conflict were to escalate it could quickly become toxic and counterproductive. In order to de-escalate the shouting, I brought them into a private mediation. This is where one of the engineers started to cry because he was so passionate about his vision for the project. The important elements of managing this conflict in a healthy and productive way were: 1) Giving space for each of the engineers to explain their vision 2) Mediating their discussion so that they could arrive at a productive conclusion 3) Not killing either of their passion by making them feel unheard or misunderstood Ultimately, we were able to arrive at a productive path forward with both engineers feeling heard and respected. They both continued to be top performers. In today’s newsletter, I go more deeply into how to address “Boxing Match” conflicts as both a manager and an IC. I also explain how to identify and address the other 3 common types of team conflict. You can read the newsletter here https://lnkd.in/gXYr9T3r Readers- How have you seen team member conflict handled well in your careers?

I was recently brought in to help a company fill a senior leadership position. The client had their eye on a highly impressive candidate—an executive with years of experience leading teams in major corporations. But as we dove deeper into the conversation, it became clear that the candidate’s polished resume was just the surface. We decided to take a different approach—using behavioral interviewing to explore how this candidate truly operated in leadership scenarios. Instead of focusing on "What have you achieved?" we asked, "Tell me about a time you faced a crisis, and how did you lead your team through it?" What followed was eye-opening. The candidate shared a story of how they navigated a massive company-wide disruption, not just by implementing strategy, but by engaging with every level of the team, being transparent, and ensuring collaboration across departments. This wasn’t something you could find on their resume. It was the true essence of leadership, and it was the kind of insight I now always prioritize when consulting for executive roles. Why Behavioral Event Interviewing Are a Game-Changer in Executive Consulting: 1. Beyond the Resume: We’re not hiring for what someone has done; we’re hiring for how they do it. 2. Real Leadership Qualities: Behavioral interviews highlight traits like resilience, empathy, problem-solving, and decision making which are vital in top executives. 3. Authentic Responses: By asking about specific past experiences, we avoid generic, rehearsed answers that don’t truly reflect a candidate’s leadership abilities. 4. Cultural Fit: The way a candidate responds to pressure, failure, or success shows if they align with your organization’s values and culture. 5. Predicting Future Success: Past behavior is often the best predictor of how someone will perform in similar situations in the future. As I continue consulting for top-tier executives, behavioral interviews have become my key strategy for assessing true leadership potential. It’s not just about the position they held or the titles they’ve earned—it’s about how they lead when no one’s watching. Have you ever relied on behavioral event interviews for executive hiring? What was your experience? Let’s discuss this in the comments! #ExecutiveHiring #LeadershipInsights #BehavioralInterviewing #HiringStrategies #LeadershipDevelopment #TalentAcquisition #ExecutiveConsulting #LeadershipQualities #CulturalFit

The Belousov-Zhabotinsky (BZ) reaction is a classic example of a non-equilibrium thermodynamic system that exhibits periodic oscillations in concentration over time. It is one of the most famous oscillating chemical reactions and is often used to study patterns and chaos in chemical systems. Key Features: 1.Oscillation: The reaction cycles through color changes (typically between red, blue, or yellow and colorless, depending on the indicator used). 2.Chemical Waves: In certain setups, the reaction can produce spatial patterns, like spirals or concentric circles. 3.Reaction Mechanism: It involves the oxidation of an organic substrate (often malonic acid) by an oxidizing agent (like bromate ions) in the presence of a metal ion catalyst (e.g., ferroin or cerium ions). Basic Reaction Components: 1.Oxidizer: Potassium bromate (KBrO3) 2.Substrate: Malonic acid (CH2COOH2) 3.Catalyst: Ferroin (a phenanthroline-based iron complex) or cerium (Ce4+/Ce3+) ions 4.Medium: Acidic solution (usually sulfuric acid) Mechanism: The reaction involves multiple steps with feedback loops: -Positive Feedback: Bromous acid HBrO2) accelerates its own production. -Negative Feedback: The organic substrate and bromine react, slowing the oxidation process temporarily. These feedback mechanisms create the oscillatory behavior. Visualization: -Color Changes: The redox state of the catalyst (ferroin or cerium) causes visible color changes: -Ferroin: Red (reduced) ↔ Blue (oxidized) - Cerium: Colorless (reduced) ↔ Yellow (oxidized) Applications: 1.Study of Non-Linear Dynamics: Used as a model for oscillatory processes. 2.Biological Analogies: Resembles rhythmic processes in biological systems, such as heartbeat regulation or circadian rhythms. 3.Chemical Pattern Formation: Useful for studying pattern formation and chaos theory. Fun Fact: The BZ reaction was initially dismissed by the scientific community because it appeared to violate classical equilibrium principles. Later, Anatol Zhabotinsky demonstrated its validity, earning widespread recognition.

How to be less emotionally reactive Mindfulness and Self-Awareness: Practice mindfulness techniques to become more aware of your emotions and triggers. Notice when you're becoming emotionally reactive and take a moment to pause and reflect before responding. Emotion Regulation Techniques: Learn techniques such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or visualization to help calm your emotions in stressful situations. Cognitive Restructuring: Challenge negative or irrational thoughts that contribute to emotional reactivity. Reframe situations in a more positive or balanced light to reduce emotional intensity. Practice Empathy: Put yourself in the other person's shoes and try to understand their perspective. Developing empathy can help you respond with compassion rather than react impulsively. Set Boundaries: Establish clear boundaries to protect yourself from situations or people that trigger emotional reactions. Communicate your boundaries assertively and enforce them when necessary. Develop Coping Strategies: Build a toolbox of healthy coping strategies to manage stress and emotions, such as exercise, hobbies, journaling, or talking to a trusted friend or therapist. Take Breaks: If you feel overwhelmed or emotionally reactive, take a break from the situation to collect your thoughts and regain perspective. Step outside, go for a walk, or engage in a calming activity before returning to the conversation. Practice Assertive Communication: Express your thoughts and feelings assertively, but respectfully. Avoid passive or aggressive communication styles that can escalate conflict and trigger emotional reactions. Practice Patience: Cultivate patience and tolerance for uncertainty. Accept that you cannot control everything and that some situations may require time and patience to resolve. Seek Support: Reach out to friends, family, or a mental health professional for support and guidance in managing your emotions and becoming less emotionally reactive. Remember that becoming less emotionally reactive is a gradual process that takes time and practice. Be patient with yourself and celebrate small victories along the way. Dr.Shivani Sharma #emotionalintelligence

How to Excel in Behavioral Cybersecurity Interviews Behavioral interviews can be trickier than technical ones if you are not prepared A few tips from my end 👇 Behavioral interviews dive deep into how you handle real-world challenges, collaborate with teams, and align with company culture. Expect questions around teamwork, conflict resolution, critical thinking, and ethics. 1 . Use the tried-and-tested STAR methodology for behavioral questions: - Situation: Set the scene of your story. - Task: Describe what needed to be done. - Action: Explain your specific actions. - Result: Highlight the positive outcomes. Example: Situation: Our cybersecurity team was working on a critical incident response project when a disagreement arose between two team members about the best approach to patch a vulnerability. The conflict was causing delays and affecting team morale. Task: As the team lead, I needed to resolve the conflict quickly to ensure the project stayed on track while maintaining a positive working environment. Action: I organized a meeting to facilitate open communication between the two team members. I encouraged each to explain their perspective, asked probing questions to clarify their positions, and then worked with the team to identify a solution that incorporated the strengths of both approaches. I also set clear guidelines for future communication to prevent similar conflicts. Result: The issue was resolved, and we successfully implemented a hybrid solution that enhanced the security patch. The team felt heard and appreciated, which improved collaboration moving forward. We completed the project ahead of schedule, and the incident was handled without further disruptions. 2 . Be authentic: Genuine responses foster trust and connection. Do not sound like you reading from ChatGPT ! 3. Listen carefully: Tailor your answers to directly address the questions asked. Good luck on your next interview !

Understanding Triggers: How They Affect Your Performance at Work and in Personal Life Have you ever had a day where one small thing sets you off, and suddenly everything seems overwhelming? That’s the power of triggers. They can sneak up on us, turning a productive day into a challenging one at work and in our personal lives. Marshall Goldsmith, in his book 'Triggers: Creating Behaviour That Lasts--Becoming the Person You Want to Be,' explains how recognising and managing these triggers is crucial for personal growth. He states, 'If we do not create and control our environment, our environment creates and controls us.' Imagine receiving an email with critical feedback at work; it triggers past criticism, filling you with self-doubt and frustration, leading to decreased productivity and strained relationships. Or consider a personal scenario: a family dinner turns sour when a comment hits a sore spot, leaving you hurt and defensive, affecting your emotional well-being and straining relationships. Triggers are deeply personal and can vary greatly from person to person. They often stem from past experiences and unresolved emotions. Recognising your triggers is the first step to managing them effectively. When you identify what sets you off, you can develop coping strategies, such as taking a few deep breaths, stepping away from the situation, or engaging in positive self-talk. Here are some ways to control or deal with triggers: - Stay present and aware of your emotions to prevent triggers from escalating. - Manage stress by engaging in activities like exercise, meditation, or journaling. - Talk to a trusted friend, family member, or therapist about your feelings and experiences - Protect your emotional space by setting limits with people or situations that trigger you. - Challenge negative thoughts and replace them with more positive, constructive ones. As a coach, I've seen millennials, juggling multiple responsibilities and high expectations, often struggle with triggers from work-life balance, social media pressures, and career progression; building resilience and healthy coping mechanisms is crucial. Remember, being triggered is a natural part of being human. By understanding and managing your triggers, you can maintain your performance at work, nurture your relationships, and lead a more balanced, fulfilling life. Mastering one's mind by managing your mindset helps you stay focused, calm, and resilient in facing challenges. I use Ceekr (https://bit.ly/3XolYz2) to understand my current mindset, and it’s a tool that others can use to gain insights and improve their mental resilience. By regularly checking in on your mindset, you can identify areas for growth and make proactive changes. This continuous self-awareness fosters a healthier, more adaptive approach to life's inevitable ups and downs. Stay aware, stay resilient, and take charge of your emotional well-being. #EmotionalIntelligence #PersonalGrowth #Ceekr #CoachSharath