I’ve found myself navigating meetings when a colleague or team member is emotionally overwhelmed. One person came to me like a fireball, angry and frustrated. A peer had triggered them deeply. After recognizing that I needed to shift modes, I took a breath and said, “Okay, tell me what's happening.” I realized they didn’t want a solution. I thought to myself: They must still be figuring out how to respond and needed time to process. They are trusting me to help. I need to listen. In these moments, people often don’t need solutions; they need presence. There are times when people are too flooded with feelings to answer their own questions. This can feel counterintuitive in the workplace, where our instincts are tuned to solve, fix, and move forward. But leadership isn’t just about execution; it’s also about emotional regulation and providing psychological safety. When someone approaches you visibly upset, your job isn’t to immediately analyze or correct. Instead, your role is to listen, ground the space, and ensure they feel heard. This doesn't mean abandoning accountability or ownership; quite the opposite. When people feel safe, they’re more likely to engage openly in dialogue. The challenging part is balancing reassurance without minimizing the issue, lowering standards, or compromising team expectations. There’s also a potential trap: eventually, you'll need to shift from emotional containment to clear, kind feedback. But that transition should come only after the person feels genuinely heard, not before. Timing matters. Trust matters. If someone is spinning emotionally, be the steady presence. Be the one who notices. Allow them to guide the pace. Then, after the storm passes, and only then, you can invite reflection and growth. This is how you build a high-trust, high-performance culture: one conversation, one moment of grounded leadership at a time.
Methods for Encouraging Emotional Expression in Teams
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Summary
Encouraging emotional expression in teams means creating an environment where individuals feel safe to share their emotions openly, enabling stronger connections, better communication, and improved team dynamics.
- Practice active listening: Focus on being present when someone shares their emotions, offering them a calm and empathetic space to express themselves without interruption or judgment.
- Name and normalize emotions: Acknowledge emotions openly during discussions to reduce tension and model emotional intelligence, helping the team navigate challenging moments constructively.
- Invite collaborative dialogue: Ask team members for their perspectives and work together to find solutions that address both emotional and practical concerns.
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I've been in countless tense team moments where emotions threatened to derail everything. The physiological response is real—racing heart, flushed face, mind suddenly blank. What I've learned is that our brains literally work differently when emotions take over. The amygdala (the ancient survival center) floods our system with stress hormones, and suddenly our prefrontal cortex—where all our thoughtful leadership skills live—goes offline. My most effective technique for these moments is incredibly simple yet powerful: 𝗡𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗻𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘇𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻. When I notice tension rising (in myself or others), I might say: "I'm noticing I'm feeling defensive right now, and need a moment to gather my thoughts." "It seems like emotions are running high. Let's pause and take a deep breath together." This isn't about suppressing feelings—it's about acknowledging them so they don't control the conversation. Neuroscience confirms that simply naming emotions reduces their intensity. Most importantly, this practice models what emotional intelligence looks like in action, showing your team that emotions aren't something to fear or avoid, but natural responses we can work with constructively. What's your go-to technique for managing emotions during challenging team moments? Share your practice. P.S. If you’re a leader, I recommend checking out my free upcoming challenge: The Resilient Leader: 28 Days to Thrive in Uncertainty https://lnkd.in/gxBnKQ8n #EmotionalIntelligence #TeamDynamics #DifficultConversations #LeadershipSkills #WorkplaceWellness
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WHEN TEMPERS FLARE, YOU'RE LOCKED IN A STALEMATE, OR A MULTI MILLION DOLLAR DEAL IS ON THE LINE, EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY TO TURNING IT AROUND. The right communication framework fosters understanding, strengthens relationships, and drives powerful results within your team. Both personally and professionally, effective communication is key to successful teamwork, conflict resolution, and collaboration. From construction to finance, from fashion to family offices, my high performance clients master the skills to navigate the toughest conversations and transform them into their biggest breakthroughs. And here’s how you can do it too: 1. FRAME THE POSITIVE INTENTION: Start with shared goals. Establish a shared purpose to align your conversation positively and maintain the focus on optimal outcomes. ➡️”We both want [a positive, uplifting relationship].” “This is about us being [happier, more productive].” A positive start encourages cooperation and a safe space for communication. 2. DESCRIBE THE OBSERVABLE: Present facts without emotional interpretation. Focus on specific events or behaviors rather than feelings. ➡️ “When [specific event] happened, I saw [specific observation].” Stick to observable facts and avoid personal interpretations to keep the conversation neutral. 3. SHARE THE FEELING: Express your emotions without blame. Own your feelings without blaming others, and invite the other person to share theirs. ➡️“We both feel [emotion].” “I feel [emotion] about [situation].” Take ownership of your feelings. Express them without pointing fingers and encourage others to do the same. 4. REQUEST THEIR PERSPECTIVE: Invite input and collaboration. Ask for the other person’s perspective to gain insight into their viewpoint. ➡️“How did you see that?” “What did you observe?” Listen actively and be open to hearing the other person’s thoughts, fostering mutual understanding. 5. MAKE THE ASK WITH BENEFIT EXTENSIONS Propose mutually beneficial solutions: Offer choices that meet both parties' needs. ➡️ “If [action] occurs, we would feel [emotion] and [emotion].” “Here are two options that work for me…” Present two acceptable options to empower the other person to contribute to the solution. 6. WORK TOGETHER TO BUILD A CONSENSUS Collaborate on finding the best solution: Work together to determine the best course of action and express appreciation when a decision is made. ➡️ “I appreciate the thought you’ve put into this. I’m glad we agreed on [decision].” By applying my effective communication framework, you foster open, respectful communication that builds trust, enhances collaboration, and contributes to team success. And the great news is that you can use this both personally and professionally! I’m curious… ~When was a time that you needed this framework in your life? #future #communication #success