Promoting Emotional Reflection

When you notice a spike in emotion, avoid the urge to rush past it. Instead, pause and gently trace the whole arc of your experience: Trigger → Feeling → Reaction → Hidden Meaning → Reset Ask yourself: What message was my body or mind trying to send at that moment? Research in neuroscience and emotional psychology (Gross, Barrett, et al.) reminds us that emotional surges aren’t random; they are signals pointing to concerns about safety, fairness, and belonging, especially in professions where stakes are high and change is ongoing. Application for Interpreters (during times of collective challenge and transformation): After difficult sessions, or when uncertainty about the profession’s direction weighs on you, create space for debriefing, alone, with trusted colleagues, or in your personal reflections. Try asking: “What did this feeling reveal about my need for safety, justice, or alignment?” Right now, many in our interpreting community are navigating heated discussions, shifting policies, and questions of leadership and values. Emotional reactivity isn’t weakness, it’s evidence of unmet needs and vital values. Studies by Gross, Barrett, and others show that nurturing emotional awareness (instead of suppressing strong feelings) strengthens our agility and clarity. By normalizing and welcoming a full range of reactions, anger, fear, hope, frustration, we foster both personal and professional resilience. This is especially important in times of turbulence, when many are searching for healing and stability. The Healing Path Forward: If you’ve felt more emotional spikes or uncertainty than usual, you are not alone. Our field is experiencing a season of change and debate, which impacts us all. Turning toward your reactions with gentle curiosity, asking, "What is this feeling telling me?" can be a source of healing. In honoring these emotions, we discover ways to support one another, realign with our values, and build integrity even amidst uncertainty. Through collective reflection and personal care, interpreters can move through adversity and find deeper wellbeing, together.

When Is a brilliant jerk just a jerk? Why do we tolerate people who deliver results but leave chaos in their wake? Having worked in recruitment for years, I’ve seen it time and again: companies excuse flawed leaders simply because they’re high performers. Often, these individuals are promoted beyond their capabilities, amplifying their negative impact on their teams. I’ve frequently questioned how these behaviours align with our stated company values. Why do managers “turn a blind eye.” overlooking poor conduct simply because ‘Sam’ bills over $1 million a year? One of my more memorable career experiences involved a former CEO who loved quoting a famed All Blacks rugby player's book: “Guys, we have a no d**kheads policy here,” he’d proudly declare. Yet, as people shuffled out of the board room, whispers of his behaviour would follow. Ironically, he was perhaps the biggest d**khead in the company—a textbook brilliant jerk. Unchecked, these individuals kill company culture, sap morale, and erode trust. I know this all too well because I’ve been there. Looking back on my early leadership days, I cringe. Was I that jerk? The reflection hurt. But it’s true. I was a jerk. I needed to change. I recognised that leadership is more than results. Empathy. Communication. Adaptability. Emotional intelligence. Compassion. These aren’t just “soft skills” – they’re essential for thriving in the workplace and growing as a leader. The good news. You can develop them too. But one often overlooked skill is reflection. If you are serious about your leadership, you must "hold up the mirror." Self-reflection is the foundation for personal and professional growth. It allows you to: -- Assess your strengths, weaknesses, and behaviours. -- Identify blind spots. -- Make better decisions and solve problems more effectively. -- Stay aligned with your core values and goals. Research shows that the habit of reflection separates extraordinary leaders from mediocre ones. I’d go so far as to argue that it’s the cornerstone of all other leadership skills. Reflection takes courage. It’s intentional. Deliberate. Thoughtful. Reflection is a practice. You can make it a daily habit—a ritual. Yet reflection isn’t easy. It’s uncomfortable and ego-bruising. But it’s also necessary. Great leaders don’t just learn from their successes—they mine their failures for insights, using the lessons to shape a better future. Being at the “top of your game” only comes when you extract how to engage the future from your past. But go easy on yourself. Excellence comes from falling, standing up, and dusting yourself off. Study those failures, and you’ll be less likely to trip again. Flawed leaders will always exist, but without self-reflection, you might become one of them. Don’t let brilliance turn into arrogance. Instead, commit to growing into the kind of leader who elevates both results and relationships. You need reflection to avoid ending up being a jerk.

Reflection is one of the most powerful tools for growth. Yet, its so easy to overlook. I've always asked myself: What’s working? What isn’t? What can I do better? Make this happen: 1. Block Time: Put an hour on your calendar at the end of each month. Treat it as a non-negotiable meeting with yourself. 2. Ask the Right Questions: I use these prompts: • What were my biggest wins this month? • What challenges did I face, and how did I handle them? • What lessons did I learn? • Where did I spend my time, and was it aligned with my goals? • What do I want to do differently next month? 3. Write It Down: There’s something powerful about putting pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard). Documenting your thoughts helps clarify them and gives you something to review later. 4. Set Intentions: Based on your reflection, identify 2-3 priorities for the next month. Keep them actionable and specific. Reflection is about learning from your experiences. It’s about stepping back, recalibrating, and moving forward with intention.

Oh yes, the past can hurt Remember when you spilled coffee all over your boss during your first big presentation? Or when you confidently sent an email only to realize you had misspelled the client's name? These cringe-worthy moments are the ghosts of your professional past, but guess what? They're also your greatest teachers. As Rafiki from The Lion King wisely said, "Oh yes, the past can hurt. But you can either run from it or learn from it." Research shows that reflective practice is a cornerstone of effective leadership. According to a study by HBS, employees who took time to reflect on their work at the end of the day improved their performance by 23% compared to those who didn't. Reflection allows leaders to gain insights from their experiences, fostering a cycle of continuous learning & improvement. Ignoring past mistakes can lead to a phenomenon known as the “Ostrich Effect,” where leaders metaphorically stick their heads in the sand to avoid confronting uncomfortable truths. A study by UQ found that avoidance coping strategies are associated with higher levels of stress & lower levels of job satisfaction. By not facing our past blunders, we deprive ourselves of valuable lessons that could prevent future mishaps. Humor is a powerful tool in leadership. When leaders use humor to address past mistakes, it creates a positive, open environment where team members feel safe sharing their own experiences & learn collectively. Let’s revisit that coffee spill incident. Instead of running away from the embarrassment, imagine turning it into a funny story during a team meeting. "Remember that time I gave our CEO a caffeine bath? It was a wake-up call for both of us!" This approach humanizes the leader & sets a tone that it's okay to make mistakes—if we learn from them. 1. Conduct a "Fail Fest": Create a safe space where team members can share their professional blunders in a light-hearted manner. This practice encourages transparency & collective learning. 2. Implement reflective practices: Incorporate regular reflection sessions into your routine. Ask yourself & your team questions like, "What went well?" "What could have been done differently?" & "What did we learn?" 3. Encourage constructive feedback: Foster a culture where feedback is seen as a gift rather than criticism. Constructive feedback helps identify areas for improvement & reinforces the value of learning from past experiences. 4. Celebrate Growth: Acknowledge & celebrate improvements & lessons learned. This reinforces the positive outcomes of reflecting on past mistakes & encourages ongoing personal & professional development. The past is not a place to dwell in regret; it's a treasure trove of lessons waiting to be uncovered. As leaders, we can either run from our past or learn from it. By embracing our mistakes with humor & reflection, we transform them into stepping stones toward success. #Leadership

Emotional Agility when you lose a bid Bid A few months ago, we faced a tough moment.
A major customer bid we’d been pursuing for months — countless calls, proposals, and travel — suddenly fell through. We had even baked into our budget! Some blamed the product, some on pricing, some on our lack of ability: list went on! 
And if I’m honest, my first reaction was frustration. 
Instead of jumping into analysis or blame, I asked: “Let’s pause. Not to talk about numbers — but how we’re feeling right now.” It was quiet at first. Someone said, “I feel deflated.”
Another added, “We worked so hard, and it still wasn’t enough.”
 By the end, the energy had shifted — from frustration to reflection. That’s when I realized: we weren’t just managing a lost bid — we were managing emotion. What I leaned at Stanford University Stanford’s research shows that how leaders respond to emotion directly affects trust and performance. * Acknowledging emotions builds trust.
Alisa Yu and Justin Berg (GSB) found that naming emotions (“I sense frustration”) increases connection and collaboration. * Emotions guide better decisions.
Professor Baba Shiv notes that leaders who recognize their emotional cues make clearer, values-driven choices. * Authenticity matters.
Francis Flynn’s research highlights that genuine, gradual behavior change earns more credibility than quick, performative fixes. * Mindfulness reduces reactivity.
Fredrick Luskin teaches that pausing to observe emotion before responding builds resilience and presence. Why This Matters in Telecoms In commercial telecom roles, pressure is constant — pricing challenges, customer churn and being outdone on bids. 
It’s easy to become reactive or transactional. Emotional agility helps us slow down, stay human, and lead from clarity instead of emotion.
It turns tough moments — like a lost bid — into leadership opportunities. WHATS HELPED ME 1. Pause before reacting.
One mindful breath before replying changes everything. 2. Name emotions early.
“This feels disappointing — but we’ll learn from it.” Acknowledgment breaks tension. 3. Run emotional debriefs.
After major bids, wins, or losses — ask: “What did we learn, and how did it feel?” 4. Anchor in values.
When stakes are high, revisit your team’s “why”: reliability, integrity, partnership. 5. Model authenticity.
Be open about your emotions — without dramatizing them. It builds trust, not distance. MY LEARNING MOMENT Telecoms might run on connectivity — but leadership runs on human connection. Emotional agility isn’t a soft skill. It’s a strategic capability that turns pressure into purpose, and setbacks into stronger relationships. Research reminds us: “Emotions aren’t obstacles to performance — they’re information to lead by.” How do you stay emotionally agile when a big deal doesn’t go your way? 
I’d love to hear from other commercial leaders in telecoms #EmotionalAgility #LeadershipDevelopment #AuthenticLeadership #Resilience

🌿 To My Fellow DEI Practitioners: A Call to Reflect and Reimagine Some of us are tired. We carry the weight of this work not just professionally but often personally. Many of us have lived experience—skin in the game. We aren’t just navigating the backlash against DEI; we’re feeling its sting daily. It’s pervasive, persistent, and frankly, sometimes paralyzing. So, how do we keep going when the ground beneath us feels shaky, when progress is slow, and when our commitment takes a mental and emotional toll? How do we remain committed to this work despite these challenges? Here are a few strategies I’ve found valuable, and I invite you to add your own: ⚓ Anchor in Data-Driven Progress: While lived experiences fuel our passion, anchoring our work in *measurable outcomes* helps remind us that even small shifts matter. Tracking improvements—whether in hiring, retention, or the climate survey results—can validate our efforts when broader change feels elusive. 🗣️ Engage in Peer-Led Reflection Circles: Instead of facing this isolation alone, we can create spaces to gather with fellow DEI practitioners for structured reflection. Think of it as a safe space to exchange insights, celebrate small wins, and acknowledge setbacks. Regular group reflection can help reduce burnout and maintain momentum. 🔄 Shift the Conversation to the Organization: Our resilience is crucial, but so is the role of our employers or partner organizations. It’s time to ask: "How is your organization showing up for you? Is there investment in mental health support beyond 'self-care days'? Are there resources to support professional development in advocacy skills, conflict resolution, or trauma-informed leadership? These aren’t “nice-to-haves”—they’re necessities. 🔍 Interrogate & Adjust Our Own Practices: Sometimes, we need to pause and assess whether the approaches we've used are still serving us. Are our frameworks for change still effective in the current climate? If not, how do we adapt? Revisiting organizational audits and rethinking strategy can renew our sense of agency, even when resistance seems entrenched. Support should not be a one-way street. As much as we ask our organizations to step up, we must also ask how we support each other. Are we reaching out when we see colleagues struggling, offering mentorship, or simply providing a listening ear? In an era where DEI feels under siege, our community can be a powerful network of resilience. This work matters. So, I put this to you, fellow DEI practitioners: What keeps you going? What has helped you hold the line when the work feels heavy? What support should our organizations be providing, and how can we make sure they’re held accountable? Let’s have a real conversation—beyond the buzzwords—about how we can sustain each other and the future of this critical work. Drop your thoughts below, and let's crowdsource solutions that go deeper than just “self-care.”

🔄 The Post-Meeting Emotional Debrief: A Leadership Growth Hack 🧠 Neuroscience Insight: Ever left a meeting feeling unheard, undervalued, or frustrated? Our brains are wired to react emotionally first—triggering stress responses that, if unchecked, can impact how we lead. But here’s the good news: Reflection rewires the brain for emotional intelligence and self-regulation. 📖 A Quick Story: A leader I worked with kept getting interrupted in meetings. Each time, frustration built, leading to disengagement and resentment. Instead of addressing the issue, they walked away thinking, “They don’t respect my input.” 🚀 Here’s the shift: I introduced them to a simple Post-Meeting Emotional Debrief: 🔹 What emotion did I experience? Frustration, feeling dismissed. 🔹 How did I handle it? I withdrew instead of speaking up. 🔹 What will I do differently next time? Use a respectful but firm phrase like, “I’d love to finish my thought before we move on.” 🔥 New Mindset: Instead of assuming bad intent, the leader reframed interruptions as a chance to improve communication dynamics. Over time, this exercise helped them develop composure and confidence—two essentials in high-impact leadership. 💡 CRAVE Leadership in Action: ✔ Empathy – Understanding behaviors rather than assuming intent. ✔ Authenticity – Assertiveness without losing professionalism. ✔ Respect – Balancing self-expression with composure. ✨ Your Turn: Think back to your last meeting. What emotion did you walk away with? What will you do differently next time? Drop a comment below—I’d love to hear your insights! ⬇️ #DrAmin #CRAVELeadership #NeuroLeadership #EmotionalIntelligence #LeadershipDevelopment #CommunicationSkills #SelfAwareness

The quarterly ritual that makes leaders wiser, not just busy. A proven framework to transform every decision: As leaders, we often rush forward, rarely pausing to mine the wisdom hidden in our past decisions. Yet our brilliant leadership insights often come not from looking down in judgment but looking back with curiosity. I've observed how some leaders treat every decision as a building block of wisdom. They create spaces where teams can reflect without judgment, transforming yesterday's choices into tomorrow's insights. Here's a people-centered approach to decision reflection that builds both wisdom and psychological safety: 1. Create a reflection-safe space 2. Document with heart and mind 3. Hold quarterly reflection sessions 4. Ask questions that matter 5. Transform insights into action Remember: Wise leadership isn't about perfect decisions. It's about creating an environment where every choice - whether brilliant or challenging - contributes to your team's collective growth while preserving everyone's emotional wellbeing. "May your choices reflect your hopes not your fears."- Nelson Mandela Your leadership journey holds wisdom others need to hear. What past decision taught you the most about leading with both effectiveness and compassion? Share below. ♻️ Repost this to help build a culture of reflection. + Follow Michelle Awuku-Tatum for more insights on leadership, team dynamics and workplace culture. 

Recently, a question posed to my 12-year-old son sparked a profound reflection on emotional intelligence and parenting. "Are you a girl? Why do you keep crying?" they asked. This moment highlighted a lingering societal stereotype – the misconception that expressing emotions is a sign of weakness, particularly in boys. Firstly, it's essential to clarify: my son doesn't cry all the time. However, he does express his emotions openly, a trait my wife and I have encouraged since his early years. In a world where the stigma around boys showing vulnerability still exists, particularly among certain generations and cultures, we've chosen a different path for our children. We took the opportunity to explain to the inquirer that our son's behavior is intentional. We are nurturing our children to be: ✅ Socially Aware ✅ Empathetic ✅ Helpful ✅ Creative ✅ Competent ✅ Confident Part of this development involves teaching them to process their emotions healthily. When faced with situations they don't understand or can't handle, they might choose silence or tears. We encourage them to express their feelings, even if it means crying, followed by a conversation to talk things through and find solutions. This approach is not just about fostering emotional expression; it's about building emotional resilience and intelligence. It's about preparing our children to navigate a complex world with empathy and understanding, to be leaders who recognize the strength in vulnerability. In a society that often equates tears with weakness, especially in males, it's time to shift the narrative. Let's teach our children that true strength lies in the courage to show and share their emotions. #Parenting #EmotionalIntelligence #Empathy #ChildDevelopment #MentalHealthAwareness #gauravgrams LinkedIn for Creators

💡 An unexpected benefit of Emotional Intelligence… The ability to learn from #failure. There’s much talk about “failing fast” and the importance of learning from mistakes. But this often overlooks the fact that often, mistakes and failures feel painful or uncomfortable. 😞 We may experience embarrassment, a bruised ego, loss of confidence, or even imposter syndrome. If we aren’t emotionally intelligent, we might try to avoid these feelings altogether. Or worse, we may internalise them and begin believing that feeling like an imposter means we are one. ❤️ 🧠 However, when we develop our self-awareness and emotional intelligence, we can recognise that discomfort is actually a signal of growth. True learning rarely happens within the comfort zone. So, the next time you make a mistake, try this: ⏸️ Pause and notice how you feel. 🌀 Describe your emotions in terms of physical sensations. For example: “It feels like a heavy weight on my shoulders” or “There’s a fluttering in my stomach.” 📍 Use techniques to distance yourself from your emotions: “I notice I’m feeling this way, but I know feelings aren’t facts – they’re just feelings.” 💭 Reframe your thoughts: instead of saying “I’m a failure,” say “I’m having the thought that I’ve failed.” By recognising and allowing yourself to experience these emotions without letting them take over, you make space for reflection, learning, and growth. ⏩ Only then can you truly learn from your mistakes and move forward with greater resilience. 💬 How do you handle failure? 💬 What helps you to learn and grow from your mistakes? 💡 If you’re interested in developing your #EmotionalIntelligence, feel free to drop me a message to learn more. 💡 If you’re a small business owner in Ireland, we can chat about funded supports you can avail of. Jigsaw Better Business