Learning To Pause Before Reacting In Tense Situations

The best leaders do not react in crisis—they pause with purpose. There is a lot going on in the world, and leaders are being required to make high-stakes decisions under pressure, many without enough time, data, or emotional clarity. The most effective leaders do not rush into crisis decisions. They pause on purpose. I learned this lesson the hard way. A few years ago, I found myself in a high-stakes situation in my business. My instinct was to respond immediately, to fix it, to move, but something in me said, pause. Instead of reacting, I gave myself 24 hours. In that space, I calmed my thoughts, gathered facts, consulted trusted people, and created a plan I could stand behind. Looking back, that 24-hour pause changed everything. It turned what could have been a rushed, emotional decision into a moment of clarity and leadership. Now, I teach this to every executive I work with. I call it the 24-Hour Principle. Unless there is immediate physical danger, give yourself a full day before making any major crisis decision. Here is how I break it down: ✅ First 6 hours: Process emotions and gather initial facts ✅ Next 12 hours: Consult with key stakeholders and experts ✅ Final 6 hours: Analyze potential impact and outline your response This is not procrastination. This is strategic patience. Research shows that Leaders who follow this model avoid the majority of regret-filled decisions that come from acting under emotional stress. The 24-hour buffer gives you time to shift from reaction to strategy. It helps you lead with intention, not panic. Next time you are in crisis mode, try this. Set a timer. Breathe. Create space for your best thinking to show up. What is your biggest leadership challenge right now? #leaders #leadership #leadershipdevelopment #crisismanagment

Think of your last difficult conversation or conflict in a relationship. What was your immediate impulse? Was it to prove you were right? To withdraw in order to avoid confrontation? To make peace at any cost? In the years I’ve spent working with leaders, I’ve noticed each of these patterns, both in professional and personal relationships: When relationships rupture, we rush to fix things externally before we’ve found our own center. Here’s what I’ve found works better: 1. Before reacting, take time to quiet your nervous system and let your first impulse pass. 2. See if you can intentionally soften your heart. 3. As soon as you’re feeling calmer, ask yourself, “What would I do here at my best?” 4. If you get a clear answer, do it. If you don’t, ask an honest question before making a statement. This simple shift—pausing to restore your own balance before attempting to restore the relationship—can transform a reactive conversation into a genuine reconnection. It’s an inside job.

The space between an event or situation and our reaction to it is where transformation happens. Victor Frankl once wrote: “Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” That “space” he describes is a gift—one we often overlook in our busy, reactive lives. Yet, how we use it shapes our relationships, our leadership, and even our sense of self. As I reflect on my own journey, I’ve realized that learning to pause in that space has been so important. It’s where clarity, curiosity, and care live. It’s where we reclaim our power to act thoughtfully instead of react impulsively. Here are three ways we can make the most of that space: (1) Pause with Purpose In moments of tension or uncertainty, resist the urge to act immediately. Take a breath. Ask yourself: What outcome do I truly want here? The pause allows you to respond intentionally, rather than reactively. (2) Get Curious About Your Reaction When you feel triggered, dig deeper. Why does this bother you? What assumptions are you making? Curiosity in that space not only helps you understand yourself but also creates opportunities for growth and connection. (3) Choose Your Response with Care Once you’ve paused and reflected, act in a way that aligns with your values. This alignment builds trust with others and strengthens your own sense of purpose. Each of us has the power to turn that space into a place of possibility. How we use it determines the transformation we create in our lives and others’. #reaction #learning #growth #change #reflection #intentionality #selfReflection