How to Foster Personal Growth Through Leadership Conversations

In my previous post, I introduced the first "G" of the 4G manager framework - helping your people ✨ Glow ✨. While this requires skill-building and intention, helping your team Glow is both gratifying and feels good. Many managers are inherently driven to excel in this area. 🚀 However, the second "G" - guiding people to 'Grow' through constructive feedback, productive stretch, and career conversations - can feel disconcerting and uncomfortable to most managers. And yet, avoiding it has real costs to employee development 🌟 Here are some tips to make this G - Grow - feel more approachable and effective: 1️⃣ Constructive Feedback: Focus on pinpointing specific, observable behaviors and their impact on the business or the team. Steer clear of speculating about motives and instead, concentrate on the tangible. Real-time, concrete feedback builds trust far better than waiting for bi-annual reviews to discuss developmental opportunities. 💡 📣 Pro tip: Remember, you're responsible for delivering feedback constructively and objectively, not for how someone chooses to respond. Keep your focus on their growth 🌱, not on expressing yourself. 2️⃣ Productive Stretch: Empower your team to step outside their comfort zones into the realm of "productive discomfort." 🔥 This is where they flex new muscles, learn fresh skills, and ascend the steep slope of their learning journey. 🌈 📣 Pro tip: While it may be challenging to watch someone grapple with challenges before mastering a skill, allow them the space to figure it out independently before stepping in. The steep climb is a vital part of the growth process and isn't meant to be a cozy journey. ⛰️ 3️⃣ Regular Career Conversations: Engage in open, supportive dialogues about your team members' aspirations, focusing on values and desired skills. By doing this, you empower them to embark on new S-curves. 🛤️ 📣 Pro tip: For newcomers to your team, career conversations can center on thriving in their current role, without an immediate focus on their next move. Remember, not all career discussions are about the next step. 🌟 Do you have additional insights on helping your people 'Grow' as we head into review season? Do share!🌱✨ #Management #Leadership #EmployeeDevelopment #CareerGrowth #ProfessionalGrowth

In coaching, we often see clients caught up in a false dichotomy when it comes to behavioral change.   For example…perhaps you received feedback that you need to be more assertive or communicate more confidently.   This can be met with fear:   “But I don’t want to be a jerk. John acts like that, and no one can stand him!”   In these situations, I encourage you to view ways of being not as “either/or” but rather on a spectrum. After all, there’s a long yardstick between being passive and being insensitive.   Consider these questions and thoughts to facilitate a reframe around change:   -   Instead of thinking of someone who embodies the opposite of where you are now, can you think of someone you know or work with (past or present)  who embodies/exemplifies the behavior you’d like to strive for?   -   Have you “tried on” being a different way? What happened? What evidence would say that you would radically swing to an undesired outcome?   -   Become aware of your core values. If you value empathy and kindness, what makes you think you’d abandon those in the pursuit of something like more confident communication?   Remember, humans are incredibly dynamic; we are not fixed beings. Our ability to flex and stretch without breaking is one of our greatest gifts. #leadership #growth #executivecoaching

US Distance Learning Association (#USDLA) had a session noting student success increased when the instructor met with the student 1:1 and provided consistent, constructive #feedback. Having a connection with someone who cares and provides guidance makes a difference to employee success (and #retention) too. Let me ask, who would you prefer to work for? Someone who rarely gives you any feedback on your work, meets maybe monthly for a brief check-in where they ask you to report on your progress and seem busy and distracted or someone who regularly gives you feedback, meets with you regularly, coaches you, listens to your updates and challenges, asks you open-ended questions, and helps you find solutions. I'm guessing the latter where your leader actively provides feedback and regularly meets with you. Creating the connection and having personal conversations is one of the most powerful tools a leader can use to influence a teammates behavior, attitude, and results. This session reminded me of the true value of #leadership. The last 3 years showed we need #leaders who care about teammates as individuals, not just as workers. They show that they are invested in their success and well-being, not just in their output and results. They create a positive and productive work environment where a teammate feels valued, empowered, and inspired. We can focus on #performance but not at the loss of person, it is all wrapped up in one package. Lesson relearned is if we want to see performance success, invest the time to connect with your teammates. Schedule frequent and consistent 1:1 meetings to discuss work and life, provide feedback, and coach them. Use the time to have conversations with your teammates, understand their needs and perspectives, and help them grow and excel. Everyone succeeds then.

🔥 Have you experienced the transformative power of feedback?🔥 Feedback that hits you in the gut? That feels like someone took a 2x4 to your head? That might have been painful to hear but so necessary because now you know what you need to work on! 💪 As a seasoned executive leadership coach, I've had a front-row seat to significant transformations. Each one kick-started by feedback. Sometimes it was a 360, other times it was the clear signal received when a client didn't get the promotion or a raise. Whatever form the feedback took, it became the catalyst for change!! So, if it's the fuel that starts the fire, why do many cringe at the thought of asking for feedback? There's a misconception that feedback aims to blame and highlight flaws. However, a well-delivered, constructive critique can help you to focus on the areas that need work to make you a better leader. But how do you get good feedback especially as a senior leader? You ask for it! Here are some question you can ask to get effective, constructive feedback. 💫"What can I do to support you to do your best work" 💫"What obstacles or challenges are you facing, and how can I help you overcome them?" 💫"Are there any resources or tools you need to succeed?" 💫"What feedback or suggestions do you have for me to be a more effective leader for you and the team?" 💫"What is one thing I can do starting today to support you better?" Each question is designed to inspire open, honest responses. They invite your team to provide feedback while signaling your willingness to grow and improve. Remember, feedback is a gift. It's an opportunity to learn, to grow, and to become a better version of yourself. The key lies in asking the right questions. What other questions can you ask to become a better leader? And don't forget to give feedback generously and often. This is how you will make the people around you better! If you are looking for some frameworks for how to do that, see the illustration below. #LeadershipDevelopment #ExecutiveCoach #LeadershipCoach #AhernLeadershipCoaching #MakeItMatter Image credit Chris Donnelly

Leadership Insights: Learning to Stop for Growth Just getting into my new read of the year, "What Got You Here Won't Get You There" by Marshall Goldsmith. I was quickly inspired by Peter Drucker's wisdom, "We spend a lot of time teaching leaders what to do. We don't spend enough time teaching leaders what to stop. Half the leaders I have met don't need to learn what to do. They need to learn what to stop." This resonates deeply with the essence of leadership evolution; my evolution. Growth isn't just about acquiring new skills; it's equally about shedding old habits. Goldsmith brilliantly highlights the importance of self-awareness and the courage to identify behaviors that might hinder our journey to becoming better leaders and people. Habits Leaders Need to Stop (A few favorites): 1. Not Taking Time to Reflect: Regular self-reflection is essential for leadership growth. 2. Ignoring Personal Well-being: Prioritize self-care; a healthy leader is a resilient leader. 3. Not Listening: Actively listen without interruptions; understanding precedes effective leadership. 4. Being Defensive: Accept feedback gracefully; defensiveness inhibits personal growth. 5. Failing to Celebrate Wins: Acknowledge achievements; celebrate successes with the team. 6. Clinging to the Past: Embrace change; don't let past successes limit future opportunities. 7. Not Having a Clear Vision: Define a clear vision for yourself and your team; clarity inspires. 8. Avoiding Difficult Conversations: Tackle challenges head-on; constructive conversations are catalysts for improvement. 9. Neglecting Professional Development: Stay curious; continuously invest in your leadership skills. 10. Lacking Gratitude: Express gratitude; appreciation fuels motivation and commitment. Leadership Growth Tips: • Self-Reflection: Regularly assess your leadership style and its impact. • Seek Feedback: Actively solicit input from peers, subordinates, and mentors. • Continuous Learning: Stay curious; invest time in expanding your leadership toolkit. • Actionable Goals: Develop a plan to replace old habits with positive ones. Remember, leadership is a journey, not a destination. Let's commit to not only learning new skills but also unlearning habits that might be holding us back. What behaviors do you believe leaders, or you for that matter, should "stop" for continuous growth? Share your thoughts! #Leadership #PersonalGrowth #LeadershipDevelopment #LeadershipInsights #BookRecommendation

One of the amazing leadership lessons I learned working at Life.Church is that honesty is kindness. It is common for developing leaders to shy away from giving direct feedback to struggling team members. The reasons can include underdeveloped communication skills, personal insecurities, unhealthy boundaries, not wanting to hurt feelings, being afraid of the outcome of conversations, and being generally conflict-avoidant. What we need to keep in mind, is that feedback is a healthy part of growth. By giving fearless feedback, we are entrusting our teams to handle the information and make performance adjustments based on new knowledge or perspective. When we enable bad behavior or poor performance by remaining silent or passive, we will destroy our teams and organizations from the inside out. Honesty is kindness. Honesty gives team members the opportunity to course-correct. Feedback allows teams to have a realistic picture of their performance and impact on the organization. Coaching gives team members the opportunities to overcome deficits, correct unhealthy attitudes, change negative behaviors, and improve performance. Having tough conversations isn't just part of our job, it's our inherent responsibility as great leaders to develop our teams and help them win. If a review or termination conversation is the first time a team member hears direct feedback from their leadership team - we have completely failed them. #thecrownstraightener #leadership #leadershipcoaching #feedbackmatters #feedbackculture

🌟 Leadership Insight: The Power of Deep Care in Leadership 🌟 As leaders, our role extends beyond managing projects to truly caring for our people. Throughout my career, I've observed that while projects will come and go, the lasting impact we have on our team members remains vivid in our memories. This realization underscores the importance of showing deep care in leadership, a concept that resonates deeply with me. Leadership is not just about guiding projects but nurturing people. Here are practical ways leaders can show deep care: 1) Quality Time: Invest in one-on-one time with team members. This can be as simple as regular check-ins or casual coffee meetings where the focus is on listening and understanding their personal and professional goals. 2) Empathy: Show genuine empathy. Acknowledge the challenges they face and be there to support them. This means being approachable and available when they need guidance or simply someone to listen. 3) Personal Attention: Pay attention to the small details that matter to them. Celebrate their birthdays, acknowledge their work anniversaries, and be present in moments of personal significance. 4) Open Communication: Foster an environment where open communication is encouraged. Let your team know that their ideas and opinions are valued and that it’s safe to express themselves without fear of judgment. 5) Supportive Feedback: Provide constructive feedback in a way that encourages growth and improvement, not fear or resentment. Recognize their efforts publicly and offer guidance discreetly. Each interaction is an opportunity to reinforce how much you care. The true essence of leadership lies in building trust and fostering a safe environment where team members feel seen, heard, and valued. I encourage every leader to reflect on this: "Did you remember to show deep care for your team? How can you make your team members feel truly valued today?" The best leaders focus on leaving a lasting positive impact on our people. After all, at the end of the day, it’s the people and our relationships with them that we’ll remember most. #TechLeadership #Leadership #Teamwork #ShowDeepCare

“When you solicit feedback to appear as though you care, without commitment to changing, you’re fooling only yourself.” As psychological safety has become the new buzzword, I see many leaders trying to fake it until they make it. They ask for feedback and open up the space, but if they do even receive feedback, they often fail to apply it. Here are some barriers to keep in mind if a psychological safety framework is new to you. -Trust has not been established: Trust must be earned and it can take a very long time, especially if it has already been broken. -You believe you hold the knowledge: Teams want to please their manager, if your perception of your role is the holder of knowledge, they will pick up on it and simply give you the answer you want. -Your ego is driving the car when you get critical feedback: It only takes one time for a team member to experience you at your most defensive to make them never contribute again. -You read silence as satisfaction: When you ask for feedback and you get nothing, you read this as everything is great. This is your team shutting down. You are missing the red flags that your culture is not a space for people to share authentically. So, what do you do? -You have to enhance your skills. Whether it is training or working with an executive leadership coach you have to develop the soft skills of leadership or be left behind. -Do more listening than talking when engaging with your team. Ask questions with an intent to understand not to just to respond. -Unpack your ego. There is no space for ego in leadership. This is challenging, but if you can not manager your workplace reaction to feedback, you’re not ready to lead. Remind yourself that your role as a leader is to drive people towards purpose and impact, and that all feedback is helpful in getting you there. What is the biggest barrier you’ve experienced in trying to venture into a psychologically safe leadership style? What have been your success stories? #psychologicalsafety #purposedriven #leadership #executivecoaching #leadershipcoaching #deib https://lnkd.in/eRdzuxqf

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “A genuine leader is not a searcher for consensus but a molder of consensus.” I've spent the majority of my career in leadership and it is both rewarding and humbling. One piece of advice I'd like to share is to resist the urge to rush to judgment. In leadership roles, you'll encounter a multitude of opinions and perspectives, and it becomes your responsibility to navigate through them and identify what truly matters. The decisions you make should aim to benefit not only the team you lead but also the broader organization and the individuals supporting you. Understanding the perspectives of others is crucial. Spend time with your team, get to know them personally, and comprehend what motivates them. Regular check-ins allow you to gauge how they're feeling and gain insights into their career aspirations. As a leader, it's your duty to lay out the possibilities, help them set milestones, and foster connections that can aid their professional growth. Removing legitimate barriers to success is another key responsibility. It involves carefully listening to complaints or concerns, acknowledging their validity, and providing perspective, even if the situation is beyond your control. Transparency in explaining the reasons behind certain decisions is vital. While not every change may be feasible, ensuring your team feels heard and understood fosters a positive work environment. Championing causes on behalf of your team is impactful. Even if you can't create immediate change, advocating for their concerns and making sure they are heard and considered is crucial. Feedback isn't just about finding common ground; it's about molding consensus, as Dr. King emphasized. By integrating what matters to each team member into the decision-making process, you can lead in a way that considers the sum of its parts. https://lnkd.in/gTAf4MZF #Leadership #PerspectiveMatters #TeamBuilding #CareerDevelopment #FeedbackCulture #AdvocacyInLeadership #TransparencyInLeadership #LeadershipJourney #ChampioningCauses