Conflict Resolution Education

Here are 10 principles on conflict resolution that I have picked up on as an Ombuds for the past 3 years. Sharing them today on National Ombuds Day. Many I’ve also learned from practicing law for over 30 years and as a leader in law firms, corporations, and in the Navy. 1️⃣ Address conflict early. Problems rarely get better with time. Conflict is not like fine wine. It doesn’t age well. It festers over time. 2️⃣ Handle tough issues in person with face-to-face conversations or by the phone, not by email or IM. Unless you’re saying “I’m really sorry,” or “I’ll give you a call,” avoid email for conflict resolution. 3️⃣ Assume the other party’s intentions are positive. Start by giving others the benefit of the doubt. Don’t assume everyone is purposely and intentionally against you. 4️⃣ Focus forward. Acknowledge the past and learn from it, but look to the future and let bygones be bygones. You’ll sleep better. 5️⃣ Listen first. Let the other person speak without interruption. 6️⃣ Stick to facts and data. Avoid rumors, innuendo, assumptions, and scuttlebutt. 7️⃣ Separate emotion from the issue. Address the problem, don’t criticize the person. And bring solutions. 8️⃣ Agree on ground rules and next steps. Find common ground and build on areas of consensus and agreement. 9️⃣ Be patient. Some conflicts take time to resolve, perhaps weeks or even months. Don’t give up. 🔟 Bring in a neutral when needed. An Ombuds or mediator can confidentially help when you’re stuck. Unresolved conflict drains workplace performance and morale. It can destroy families. Early, in-person resolution builds trust, restores relationships, and accelerates performance. It also makes the workplace and home a much better place for everyone.

𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗹𝗶𝗰𝘁 𝗮𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸, 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗱𝗶𝗿𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝗼𝗿 𝗽𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗶𝘃𝗲-𝗮𝗴𝗴𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝘃𝗲, 𝗶𝘀 𝘂𝗻𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗳𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲, but it’s inevitable. Yet, many don't know how to handle it effectively. Once I got curious about what causes conflict, I realized most are rooted on 3 sources: 𝟭. 𝗜𝗻𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗔𝘀𝘆𝗺𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗿𝘆: Conflict often happens when parties lack access to the same data. Their decisions clash because they’re not working with the same information. At Google Home, the e-commerce team and I didn't see eye to eye on a new service launch strategy. The economics impacted their channel performance, but after I shared the roadmap of future services that would offset the challenges, we aligned. With both teams accessing the same "data set", the conflict dissolved.     𝟮. 𝗣𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗼𝘀𝗼𝗽𝗵𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗹 𝗗𝗶𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲𝘀: Sometimes, everyone has the same facts but different priorities. One side might focus on quality vs. speed. Having a common set of principles or philosophies helps drive alignment.     While leading the transition from G Suite to Google Workspace, we restructured features across 20+ apps. Each app team had different approaches, making alignment difficult. But once we agreed on principles—like target customers profiles per subscription tier—decision-making became much easier.     𝟯. 𝗘𝗴𝗼: Sometimes it's not about data or principles— it's personal. A party may feel slighted or passed over, leading them to derail plans (consciously or unconsciously). In such cases, escalation is often the best solution.     At Adobe, I worked to align product leaders on a strategy, but some personal grievances and turf wars slowed progress. Even with shared data and principles, the conflict persisted. Escalating to senior management helped resolve the impasse and get everyone on board. 𝗛𝗲𝗿𝗲’𝘀 𝗮 𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗱𝗼𝗹𝗼𝗴𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽𝗲𝗱 𝗺𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗼𝗹𝘃𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗹𝗶𝗰𝘁: 𝟭. 𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗸 𝘁𝗼 𝗨𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗱: Identify the root cause: data gap, philosophical difference, or ego? Approach with empathy, curiosity, and zero judgment. 𝟮. 𝗔𝗹𝗶𝗴𝗻 𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗙𝗮𝗰𝘁𝘀: Share all relevant info. Ensure both sides work from the same set of truths. 𝟯. 𝗔𝗴𝗿𝗲𝗲 𝗼𝗻 𝗣𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗶𝗽𝗹𝗲𝘀: Once aligned on facts, agree on guiding principles. Debate principles, not the issue itself. 𝟰. 𝗪𝗼𝗿𝗸𝘀𝗵𝗼𝗽 𝗦𝗼𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀: Collaborate on options, weighing pros and cons together. 𝟱. 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗺𝗶𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗗𝗼𝗰𝘂𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁: Choose a solution, document it, and share with all involved. Include names and dates—this adds accountability and prevents reopening the issue. 𝟲. 𝗘𝘀𝗰𝗮𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝗶𝗳 𝗡𝗲𝗰𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗮𝗿𝘆: If all else fails, it's likely ego-driven and escalation might be necessary—and that’s okay when done responsibly. Next time conflict arises, don’t rush to fix it or let frustration take over. Step back, identify the cause, and handle it methodically. #leadership #conflict

I used to avoid conflict at all costs, then I realized workplace conflict isn’t the problem. Avoiding it is. I saw firsthand how unresolved conflict could derail teams. Miscommunication turned into resentment, small issues escalated, and productivity suffered. But when handled correctly, those same conflicts became opportunities: building trust, strengthening teams, and driving better results. That’s where RESOLVE comes in: a clear, professional framework to turn workplace tension into teamwork. **Recognize the Conflict** - Identify the issue before it escalates. - Determine if it is a personality clash, miscommunication, or a deeper structural problem. - Acknowledge emotions while staying objective. **Engage in Active Listening** - Approach the conversation with curiosity, not judgment. - Let each party share their perspective without interruption. - Use reflective listening: paraphrase what you heard to confirm understanding. **Seek Common Ground** - Identify shared goals and interests. - Shift the focus from personal grievances to organizational objectives. - Find areas where alignment already exists to build rapport. **Outline the Issues Clearly** - Define the specific problems and their impact. - Differentiate between facts, perceptions, and emotions. - Keep the discussion solution-focused rather than blame-focused. **Look for Solutions Together** - Encourage collaboration in brainstorming possible resolutions. - Evaluate each solution based on feasibility, fairness, and alignment with company values. - Ensure all parties feel heard and that the resolution is practical. **Validate and Implement Agreements** - Confirm agreement on the resolution and next steps. - Establish clear expectations and accountability measures. - Follow up to ensure continued commitment and adjustment if needed. **Evaluate and Improve** - Reflect on what worked and what didn’t. - Seek feedback on the conflict resolution process. - Use lessons learned to improve communication and prevent future conflicts. This framework ensures professionalism, encourages collaboration, and fosters a healthy workplace culture where conflicts are addressed constructively rather than ignored or escalated. What's been your experience dealing with conflict? Comment below.

I don't class conflict as a "waste" because not all conflict is bad...but unresolved conflict can be VERY wasteful in organizational improvement efforts. As a Lean and Leadership Coach, I have worked with companies to develop systems and skills to reduce harmful conflict, in order to make continuous improvement a reality. People ask me - how do you know there's conflict in the first place? Do we have to assess it in some way? Short answer yes. The problem has to be visible. My own approach is to ask questions that help me understand it through my 1:1 interviews as part of my Discovery phase. Here's what I (and many studies) see as the 5 of the main causes of workplace conflict...and how to resolve them 👇 👉 Communication Conflict: Studies have found that 39% of workplace conflicts arise from communication differences. I coached 'Joan' who told me that she and her direct report ('Jim') only interact when there's a problem. They both want the same results, but they don't spend time together proactively figuring out how to get them. Resolve it through: ✔️ Holding regular 1:1 and team check-ins ✔️ Reviewing communication and information flow as part of process improvement efforts ✔️ Improving meeting management 👉 Values Conflict: Research indicates that 18% of conflicts are due to clashing values. I see it in teams all the time- 'Mark' valued speed and 'Greg' valued precision. It turned into personal conflict as they were both too set on their own values, to try and understand where the other is coming from. Resolve it through: ✔️ Focusing on shared goals and common ground. ✔️ Respecting different viewpoints ✔️ Investing in people and leader development, to develop these skills in everyone. 👉 Resource Conflict: Studies found that 33% of workplace conflicts are due to too much work without enough support or a clash over differing cross- departmental priorities. A simple example- the Sales team rush orders to hit targets but Operations burns out trying to deliver. Resolve it through: ✔️ Being fair and transparent about resources. ✔️ Prioritizing tasks when resources are limited. ✔️ Working together to find creative solutions. 👉 Personality Conflict: One study found that a whopping 49% of workplace conflicts are attributed to clashes between personalities or egos. This comes down to how people behave, how they judge others and their level of EQ. Resolve it through: ✔️ Learning about different work styles. ✔️ Investing in personal development ✔️ Investing in team EQ development and team bonding 👉 Role Conflict: Unclear roles and responsibilities can cause confusion and disputes. Approximately 22% of workplace conflicts is said to stem from unclear roles. Resolve it through: ✔️ Clearly defining roles and responsibilities. ✔️ Reviewing job duties regularly and using them in 1:1's. ✔️ Discussing and fix any role overlaps. How should we be dealing with conflict in our organizations? Leave your thoughts below 🙏

85% of employees encounter workplace conflicts, but most leaders avoid addressing them. This used to be one of my weaknesses too, till I learnt the Thomas Kilmann Conflict Model. This categorizes all forms of conflict resolution into five distinct strategies, based on a balance between assertiveness and cooperation. Here are the 5 strategies it teaches you, and when to use each: 1. Competing You push your agenda with authority or strong arguments. It’s great for quick decisions but might strain relationships. Example: A project manager insists on a specific vendor, though the team doesn't like working with them, leading to resentment but meeting tight deadlines. 2. Accommodating You put others’ needs first to keep the peace. Best for when harmony matters more than the issue itself. Example: A team leader agrees to extend a colleague’s project deadline, even if it delays their own work, to maintain team morale. 3. Avoiding Sidestepping conflict altogether, ignoring the problem for the time being. This can be helpful when the issue is minor, but often leads to unresolved tensions. Example: An employee is unhappy with a project they’re assigned, but it’s only for 2 months, so they avoid raising concerns. 4. Collaborating You and the other party work together, investing time and resources to find a solution that satisfies everyone. Perfect for complex problems. Example: Two team leads work together to split resources between projects, ensuring both teams meet their goals without sacrificing quality. 5. Compromising You both give up something to reach an agreement. It’s a middle ground between competing and accommodating. Example: Two managers agree to split the budget increase, each getting half of what they initially wanted to support their projects. - The Thomas-Kilmann Model isn’t just a theory - it’s a practical tool you can apply daily. Consciously finding the right type of conflict handling style to use is a game changer for leaders - and will lead to a stronger team. #companyculture #leadership #strategies

Hate Conflict? Here's How You Can Deal With It Better: Conflict is a natural part of any relationship, but it doesn’t have to be a source of stress. Learning to manage conflict effectively can transform your work environment and personal relationships. Here’s how: 1. Unearth the Root Cause 🌱 Conflicts often stem from unmet needs, differing values, and expectation gaps. Understanding the real reasons behind disagreements can pave the way to resolution. 2. Embrace Different Perspectives 👀 Every person brings a unique viewpoint. It’s not about winning; it’s about understanding. Embracing these differences can enrich discussions and lead to better solutions. 3. Harness Emotional Intelligence 💡 Recognising and managing your emotions, and responding with empathy, can be a game-changer. Emotional intelligence helps in navigating interactions smoothly. 4. Create a Culture of Open Dialogue 🗣️ Foster an environment where people feel safe to express disagreements and share feedback. This minimises unresolved conflicts and promotes a healthier workspace. 5. Use Non-violent Communication 🤝 Follow these four steps: • Observations: Focus on facts and observations without judgment. ("When I see/hear...") • Feelings: Express your emotions clearly. ("I feel...") • Needs: State your needs that are connected to these feelings. ("Because I need...") • Request: Make a specific, actionable request. ("Would you be willing to...") Conflict, when handled well, can be a catalyst for growth, creativity, and stronger relationships. ✅ Here is a quick cheat sheet about handling conflict How do you handle conflict in your life? Share your strategies and experiences below! 🚀 #ConflictResolution #EmotionalIntelligence #OpenDialogue #EffectiveCommunication #Leadership #PersonalGrowth Smile and see if you can make someone else smile today 😊 ---------- 🚀 Level-up Confidence & Communication Skills 🧘🏽♀️ Resolve Conflict & Achieve Work/ Life Balance Like this post? Want to see more? Follow/ connect with me 🔔

Scrum Master: How would you manage team conflict? Conflict is inevitable. Staying stuck is optional. Ever found yourself in the middle of a heated conversation during a Sprint Retrospective or a planning session? You’re not alone. Conflict is a sign that people care but without the right approach, it can derail progress fast. Here’s a 5-Step Conflict Resolution Framework from Harry Karydes I’ve used (and coached teams on) to turn tension into TRUST 1. Identify the Root Cause ↳ Get beyond surface-level complaints. ↳ Ask open-ended questions: “What’s really bothering you?” ↳ Separate symptoms from the real issue. 2. Acknowledge & Validate Perspectives ↳ Let each person speak without interruptions. ↳ Reflect back what you heard: “What I hear you saying is…” ↳ Validate emotions, even if you don’t agree. 3. Focus on Solutions, Not Blame ↳ Shift from “Who’s at fault?” to “What’s the best way forward?” ↳ Brainstorm options together. ↳ Align solutions with team goals. 4. Create a Clear Action Plan ↳ Define who does what by when. ↳ Set measurable steps and accountability. ↳ Write it down; verbal agreements fade. 5. Reinforce the Resolution ↳ Follow up: “Is the solution working?” ↳ Address lingering issues early. ↳ Celebrate progress to rebuild trust. Pro Tip: The BEST Scrum Masters and Agile Coaches don’t avoid conflict. They facilitate healthy resolution that strengthens the team. What’s your go-to approach when conflict surfaces in your team? Drop your thoughts or tips in the comments!

Conflict kills careers: 78% of employees have quit due to workplace tension. So here's a 5-stage method to turn tension into teamwork: The SOLVE Model of Healthy Conflict Resolution: 1. Spot Issues ↳ Identify conflict early ↳ Small issues can become big problems ↳ Describe the problem without blame 2. Obtain Information ↳ Learn all sides of the story. ↳ Full understanding leads to better solutions. ↳ Listen carefully and ask good questions. 3. Look Deeper ↳ Study the problem and make a plan ↳ Good planning leads to better outcomes ↳ Think of many solutions and pick the best one 4. Validate Resolution ↳ Put the plan into action ↳ Solving conflicts helps teams grow stronger ↳ Help people talk and find agreement 5. Evaluate Results ↳ Check if the solution is working ↳ Good solutions should last long-term ↳ Keep in touch and make changes if needed   Conflict is unavoidable. Your response is what matters. Practice these steps and turn tension into teamwork. How do you handle conflict in your teams? Share your ideas in the comments ⬇️ If you enjoyed this: • Repost for your network ♻️ • Follow me for more deep dives • Join 25,500+ subscribers for more actionable tips to build your brand and protect your reputation: https://lnkd.in/edPWpFRR

Disagreements and clashes are inevitable in life - it's how you handle them that matters. Emotional intelligence is the secret for effective conflict resolution. Keep Calm and Navigate Conflict: Understand Emotions: •Recognize your feelings. •Stay calm and avoid lashing out. Listen Actively: •Focus fully. •Repeat back what you hear to ensure understanding. Stay Open: •Consider other perspectives. •Ask, "Can you explain your viewpoint?" Respond, Don't React: •Choose your words with care. •Practice pausing before responding in heated discussions. Empathy is Key: •Try to feel what the other person feels. •Put yourself in their shoes before responding. Set Clear Boundaries: •Know when to say enough. •"I think we should revisit this when we're both calmer." Stay Solution-Focused: •Shift from problems to solutions. •Ask, "What can we do to resolve this?" Motivation: •Approach conflict as a problem to be solved •Frame it as "How can we resolve this?" not "Who is right?" Social Skills •Find the right time, place and tone. •Don't air grievances in front of others Lead by example and turn conflict into collaboration. Think back on a recent conflict. How could EI have changed the outcome? Let's share experiences and grow together.

Conflict is inevitable— but how prepared are you when it shows up? One of the most underrated (yet essential) leadership skills? Conflict resolution. I’ve learned that avoiding conflict doesn’t make it disappear—it just delays progress. The real power comes from having a strategy for navigating it with intention. Here’s mine: 1. Pause before reacting. Emotions are real, but your response should be intentional. (Pro tip: Don’t send that email just yet.) 2. Seek to understand. What’s really being said beneath the surface? Is it deeper than the issue in front of you? Active listening is your superpower. 3. Address the issue, not the person. Keep it respectful. Focus on solutions, not blame. 4. Find common ground. Even in tension, there’s often a shared goal. Lead with that. 5. Follow up. True resolution isn’t just about the moment—it’s about rebuilding trust and setting clear expectations for the future. Whether at work, in a partnership, or on a team—conflict can either break connection or build it. The goal isn’t to “win”—it’s to align, evolve, and move forward. So, what’s your go-to strategy for handling conflict? #Leadership #EmotionalIntelligence #ConflictResolution #CommunicationMatters #ProfessionalGrowth #StrategyForSuccess #TeamDynamics #ClarityInConflict