How to Lead with Emotional Intelligence in Crisis

💡 The Pre-Meeting Emotional Check-In: A Game-Changer for Leaders 🧠 Neuroscience Insight: Ever walked into a high-stakes meeting feeling stressed, only to realize your tone or body language unintentionally set the wrong vibe? That’s because stress triggers a cortisol spike, increasing heart rate, shortening breath, and leading to emotional hijacking. But here’s the fix—preparing before the meeting can rewire the brain for composure and control. 🔄 A Quick Story: I once coached a leader preparing for a tough conversation with an underperforming employee. Their instinct? “I need to be firm. They need to hear the truth.” But their stress was hijacking their tone—coming off as harsh instead of constructive. ✅ The Shift: A Simple Pre-Meeting Check-In 🔹 Three Words to Embody: Calm, Encouraging, Solution-Oriented 🔹 Mirror Practice: Rehearse a balanced, supportive tone: 💬 “I appreciate your efforts and want to help you succeed. Let’s work on a plan together.” 🔥 The Outcome: Instead of shutting down, the employee engaged in the conversation. The leader communicated with clarity, respect, and vulnerability, turning a difficult discussion into a collaborative problem-solving session. 🚀 CRAVE Leadership in Action: ✔ Communication – Leading with intention and clarity. ✔ Respect – Treating team members as valued contributors. ✔ Vulnerability – Being open to difficult conversations with composure. ✨ Your Turn: Before your next meeting, try this: Write down three words that describe how you want to show up. How does it change your presence? Drop your three words in the comments—I’d love to hear them! ⬇️ #DrAmin #CRAVELeadership #NeuroLeadership #LeadershipDevelopment #CommunicationSkills #ExecutivePresence #EmotionalIntelligence

𝐖𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐚 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐥: 𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐭𝐡. The leader in question is me. I was commanding a ship during a particularly tense period and a difficult deployment when it happened. Amid a routine staff meeting, one of my collaborators reacted harshly to some instructions I had just delivered. He raised his voice and started contesting my directions heatedly. It was not the first time someone doubted or criticized my instructions, but no one had done it so loudly. I dismissed everyone else in the meeting while the collaborator and I continued the conversation alone. He kept his loud attitude while I was listening, trying to understand the reasons behind his strong (and inappropriate) reaction. That’s when something snapped in me. I, too, started raising my voice until I yelled at the top of my lungs. I think everyone on the whole ship could hear me.   After a few moments, I realized my great mistake—I had betrayed the thing I value the most: respect!   I felt ashamed of my behavior and apologized after calming down.   𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘥.   The power of poised leadership in the face of adversity.   It is not the absence of conflicts that defines our leadership but our response to them.   The solution I have implemented is proactive communication and leadership self-training focused on cultivating my emotional intelligence to avoid repeating a similar situation.   Emotional intelligence can equip leaders with the tools to manage their reactions and understand others’ emotions, ensuring that respect remains paramount in all interactions, even under super-stressing circumstances.   I have also learned to forgive myself. This episode has haunted me for a long time until recently I have entirely accepted the mistake and decided to move on.   I share this not just to revisit my past mistakes but to offer a path forward for any leader facing similar challenges. Emotional intelligence and self-compassion are essential leadership tools. Those are two critical aspects of the personal dimension of leadership that everyone should hone.   ✍ How do you navigate high-tension situations within your team?   I invite you to share your strategies or experiences in managing conflict and maintaining respect, even under pressure.  #leadership #emotionalintelligence #communication #conflictresolution

One time I walked into work holding it all together on the outside. But barely holding on inside. No one noticed. Except one leader. They didn’t say much. Just asked, “You good?” Then told me, "You know I'm here for you, Ali" (and meant it) That moment still stays with me. It wasn’t grand. It wasn’t performative. But it was real. And it was exactly what I needed. That’s what emotionally intelligent leadership looks like. It’s not always loud. It’s presence. It’s awareness. It’s care. ↳ Without needing a reason. They didn’t have a fancy title or deliver an inspiring speech. ↳ They simply noticed. 👀 Noticed when I was quieter than usual. 🙂 Noticed when I showed up with a smile that didn’t reach my eyes. 🤝 Noticed when I needed someone, not to fix it, but to see it. That’s emotional intelligence in action. ↳ Quiet. Steady. Unforgettable. Here’s what that moment taught me about emotionally intelligent leadership: 🧠 1. Emotional cues are data Silence, withdrawal, hesitation (these are signals). Don’t ignore them. Get curious. 🫶 2. Connection before correction When someone’s off, ask how they’re doing before what’s going on. Trust is built in that order. 🧭 3. Lead with presence, not pressure You don’t need grand gestures. A check-in. A pause. A kind word. They go further than you think. If you're in a leadership role (formal or informal) pause and reflect: 🔹 Who might be quietly struggling around me? 🔹 What signals am I possibly missing? 🔹 How can I be more present, even in small ways? Because real leadership isn’t always loud. ↳ Sometimes, it’s the quiet presence that speaks the loudest.

Feeling more like a therapist to your team than a leader? You’re not alone. During my recent market research project, one theme popped up again & again: leaders today feel like therapists. And not just any therapists — ones who didn’t sign up for the job, didn’t get trained for it, & now feel completely drained by it. You know what I’m talking about: *Unprompted tears in a 1:1. *Defensive outbursts between teammates. *Coaching someone through their embarrassment after a presentation went sideways. You’re doing your best, but it feels like your role has shifted from leader to emotional crisis manager. So now what? Do you update your title to “Leader + Therapist” & call it a day? Absolutely not. If this resonates, here’s what I need you to know: being a leader today requires emotional intelligence. It’s not optional, & it’s not just about managing tasks + hitting KPIs. Humans —your humans— are emotional creatures. They want to bring their whole selves to work, & if we want to bring out the best in them, we have to meet them where they are. The good news? There’s a way to lead without losing yourself in the process. Let’s break it down using Daniel Goleman’s emotional intelligence framework: 1. Self-Awareness The foundation of emotional intelligence. Tip: Before stepping into your next 1:1, pause and ask yourself, “What am I feeling right now, and how might that impact this conversation?” Your emotions will set the tone—intentionally or not. 2. Self-Management Managing your emotions in real-time. Tip: When a team member brings unexpected emotions, resist the urge to fix. Instead, ground yourself with a simple practice like taking three deep breaths before responding. This helps you stay calm and present. 3. Social Awareness The ability to read the room (or Zoom). Tip: Notice what’s not being said. Is someone’s body language tense? Is their tone sharper than usual? Ask open-ended questions to understand what’s really going on. 4. Social Influence Bringing people together and inspiring action. Tip: When emotions run high (think: team conflict or post-presentation panic), acknowledge what’s happening first. Try saying, “I can see this was frustrating—let’s talk about how we can move forward.” Validation builds trust & opens the door to solutions. Leadership will never be emotion-free. But by sharpening your emotional intelligence, you’ll stop feeling like a therapist & start feeling like the confident, connected leader your team needs. What do you think? Have you felt more therapist than leader lately?

I got to train 75 managers in how to hold Tough Conversations and how to Lead with Emotional Intelligence this week. One of the hardest moments they identified was when a team member shared a situation with a strong emotion like, 💬 "I just applied for a promotion and didn't get it again." or 💬"I've been waiting for 6 months for a development opportunity and am still waiting." or 💬"I'm struggling with personal challenges at home." The initial reaction was to want to say, "How can I help you navigate this?" or "How can I support?" These are great responses motivated to 1) help the person and 2) find a solution. But, people feel relief not because of what you do but because of the connection you make with them. In fact, jumping to a solution without acknowledging how they're feeling can intensify the feelings of being misunderstood or not supported. This is where empathy is so powerful. By taking a moment to make a statement to acknowledge the person's emotion they are feeling in the situation, we can help them feel seen, heard, and connected to. This might sound like, 💬"That's a really frustrating situation. I know how hard it is to go after an opportunity and not get it." or 💬"I know how much work you've put in to be selected for this opportunity. I'm sorry you haven't gotten the result you wanted." or 💬"I'd love to hear more. Are you willing to share with me about your situation?" By identifying with someone's emotion or asking questions to give them space to share how they're feeling, we create connection, build trust, show them support, and can help de-escalate the feelings they are experiencing. Do you have any tips for expressing empathy when a team member shares a hard situation or emotion? #leadershipdevelopment #emotionalintelligence #empathy

3-step process to leverage emotion. Reframe to regain control. I was a principal during the pandemic. School was virtual, hybrid, and in person. In one school year. It was hard. It was scary. It was uncertain. I got to school and had 2 voicemails. The first voicemail said... → Kids aren't wearing their masks right. → If you don't fix this, kids will die. → It will be all your fault. The second voicemail said... → Why are you making kids wear masks? → Kids will commit suicide due to this. → It will be all your fault. Whoa... That was heavy. #Emotions are real. They are powerful. They drive actions. As emotions go up...clarity goes down. Executing #EmotionalIntelligence allows you to leverage emotion. If you connect your head to your heart, You turn emotions into a positive. Here's a 3-step process to turn your emotions into a positive: 1. Name it to tame it. ↳ Label the emotion to get your brain engaged. 2. Honor it...don't absorb it. ↳ Accept it...even if you don't agree with it. 3. #Reframe it. ↳ Replace the negative emotion with a positive one. If you're frustrated with somebody, you will... → ID your feeling of frustration. → Know it's okay to be frustrated and look for solutions. → Reflect on why and how they add value to your life. This will allow you to maintain #clarity Overcome challenges Drive results. You will execute emotional intelligence by leveling up your... #SelfAwareness: ↳ Know your emotions and how they drive your actions. #SelfRegulation: ↳ Manage your reactions and respond with control. #Motivation: ↳ Leverage emotion to achieve rather than deceive. #Empathy: ↳ Really understand others and their experience. #SocialSkills: ↳ Communicate to connect and crush conflict. You will... → Reduce your stress → Boost your resilience → Increase your empathy → Increase your positivity → Improve your decision-making. 💡 Check out the reframe cheat sheet below. You got this. You're capable. You’re in control. Go impact the world. Have a day today.👊 Lets grow. If you found value in this, can you... ↳ Follow Josiah to connect your head to your heart. ↳ If this helped you...help somebody else and repost ♻